Before I begin, I just want to say that Elon Musk is not actually going to see and read this. This is just something for fun. On the other hand, if that 0.0000000001 chance happened and he actually came across and started reading; Well hello Mr. Musk!

First off, honor to have you here. I mean in the world. As in Elon the hero written in books. You are that Elon. Contrary to what whoever might think about you, I’d like to extend my gratitude from one soul to another. You not only created PayPal (which I don’t use), you created Tesla (which I don’t drive), and that other thing SpaceX. This is all great stuff and all but honestly, I don’t really care much about the car, or the card but what you do with SpaceX is pretty cool. I most probably will not live to see the days we colonize another planet like Mars. Though I hope we do, before mankind runs the world down to ruins. Before aliens colonize us instead. You know what i’m sayin’!? Of course you do, you’re Elon fucking Musk.

I heard you were trying to make something that will shoot us up in space and land us back down wherever we want. Like shoot up from say New York John F. Kennedy airport, and land in fuckin’ Sydney, New South Wales in 58 minutes. Is this true? If it is, please make it happen before I die. Another thing I’d like you to make happen before I die is “universal internet”. For heaven’s sake, I’m sick of Spectrum and Verizon. I want internet from space. Directly! Is that too much to ask? Last but not least, there something really important I’d like to see before I die. You and only you can make this happen. Please make Dogecoin $5! Please! But the travel thing first. As you know better than me perhaps, time is more valuable than money.

Thank you for taking this time out of your day to read a letter from someone who admires and wishes you the best. You are the light this world needed and between you and me, I think you’d kick Putin’s ass. In the future when you’re done with the checklist, please consider running for President. You have my vote, Sir! May God bless.

Warm & Kind Regards,

Citizen of the World

PS.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BUY MANCHESTER UNITED!