The Brutal Truth

Over the past several months i’ve grown and learned a few things about myself and the mystery of human nature. Confined between four walls with 7 other people has given me insight on how people behave in their relations with other people. But it extends far beyond that. Our relations with other people is just a reflection of the relationship we have with ourselves.

Too many things are easily said. Like saying I love you. It’s easy. We throw it around without knowing the weight or the responsibility that it carries. We say it without having the courage and the balls to back it up when the time comes. But how many of us truly know how comprehensive the word “love” really is ? I’ve used this word more than a few times over the years. Most recently to people who I thought were “friends”. “Friends” who told me they loved me but were the first to pounce on the opportunity to break me. People who know nothing about friendship, know nothing about love. 

Lets talk about friendship for a sec. If you call someone your friend, or say you are their friend then you must be the friend you expect your friend to be. Like the saying “Treat people the way you want to be treated”. Be the friend you want to have. Being a friend should come with no expectations. You can’t expect everyone to be as good a friend as you are to them. And that’s okay. Because this comes from your heart, so naturally you don’t expect much in return. What breaks a heart is seeing the person you give your friendship to stab you in the back, spit on your face and turn their backs on you. For no apparent reason. When you’ve done nothing wrong to them. When what hurts you isn’t their knife or spit, but their disloyalty. When all the while you’ve been a loyal friend. The friend they could call at 3am.

You don’t have to be there for me when I call you at 3am. That’s okay. I’ll still give you my love and friendship. But when you stab me in the back, spit on my face, I will erase you from my life without a second thought. And if you are capable of turning your back on a loyal friend for whatever reason, I know you have no love to give to anyone. In that case we can also question your self-love. If you call someone a “friend” a “bro” or “sis”, have the heart to back it up no matter what happens between the two of you. You can end a friendship, nothing wrong in that. But to hate and become enemies to the person you once called a friend or said I love you to is what’s fucked up. Specially if it’s for no apparent reason.

I’ve had more than a few examples of this in my life. I thank God and leave them to him. I don’t want their hatred, I don’t need their friendship, I don’t want their fake love and most of all I don’t ever wanna hear or see them again. I never wish anything bad upon them. That’s not me, I can’t wish bad upon anyone. But I know that one day they will face the consequences of their actions. One way or another. Because God big and sees everything. I’m a believer of what goes around comes around.

Being a man; is knowing how to love a woman. Not doing stuff behind your woman’s back. Taking care of her. Give her the love and respect you want to receive in return. And trust that she will give you the same if not more in return. Being a man is not talking behind your friends back. Not dragging them down whenever you get the chance. Being a man is being a gentleman. A gentleman knows how not to make enemies.

Kisacasi “Adamlik” kelimesini, “Delikanli” kelimesini kullanan bir insan, bu kelimelerin getirdigi sorumlulugu, agirligi tasimasinida bilmeli. “Kardesim”, “Dostum”, “Arkadasim” dedigi insanin arkasindan konusmaz,  bos yere kinlenmez, firsat buldugunda yermeye calismaz. Felaket birsey olsa dahi, “Delikanli” dedigin insan, bir insanin Anasina, Karisina, Bacisina laf etmez. Edersede adam olmaz. Delikanli bir insanin dostlugu bitsede, bir zamanlar “dostum” dedigi insani kotulemez. Susar, gecer gider. Son olarak gercek Adam ben “Adamim” demez. Gercek delikanli “Ben Delikanliyim” diye gezinmez. Adamlik taslayan, ama daha adam olmayi beceremeyen, delikanliyim diyen ama daha buyuyemiyen herkes ustune alinabilir.